There is a common theme in all of these threads and discussions about family courts:  Sex inequality when dealing with allegations of Domestic abuse.

Abusive fathers attack the mothers; using Gardner’s dubious theory of parent alienation.  They allege that the mother is alienating the children against the father and mothers are preventing contact by turning the children against the father through false allegations. 

Abusive fathers put their needs first: their wants and wishes: their rights.  They are very composed when they are litigants in person: they want to be in control of the courts.  As a consequence, Family court judges can identify and relate to them.

On the other hand, victims of abuse are terrified, are not composed and talk about the needs of the children: putting the children first and wanting to be protected.  They talk about the behaviour; not a dubious theory of loss of control that attacks mothers and justifies a perpetrator’s actions and their reactions.  Mothers speak about the actual behaviour and how it affects their children.  

Any experienced professional who has worked or seen the impact of domestic abuse will tell you there is one commonality:  Non abusive mothers do not want to control their children or their ex, they just want the abuse and control to stop and they want to protect their children and know they are safe.  

Family courts as they are set up do not get this; they are not set up to protect or ensure a child’s fundamental and  human right to be a happy, healthy child and have a childhood free from harm:

A safe and nurturing environment.

This is the biggest difference of all.

M  Feb 2020
M is a previous speaker at FiLiA